“You should find a mentor,” a friend once told me. At the time, I wasn’t exactly sure what mentorship entailed. I had the vague idea that a mentor was supposed to give advice or perhaps guide me through my career.

But who? And how

Mentorship is more than just a one-off chat with a senior professional or occasional words of wisdom. When done right, it’s a transformative relationship partnership that evolves, nurtures growth, and sometimes even feels like having a personal guide. Let’s explore how to find the right mentor, leverage their insights, and make the most of this journey.

Step 1: Recognising the Need for a Mentor
Many people think mentorship is for junior employees or fresh graduates. But the truth is, mentorship benefits us at every stage of our careers. From navigating a tricky work culture to setting personal development goals or even pivoting into a new industry, mentors help us see what’s possible and how to get there.
“But where do I even start looking?” you might ask. And that’s a fair question. Finding the right mentor is a bit like dating, it’s all about compatibility, shared values, and chemistry.

Step 2: Finding the Right Mentor
Mentors don’t always look like what we expect. A great mentor could be a senior colleague, a leader from another department, or even someone from a different field. Think about someone whose career, skills, or values you admire.

Here are some key considerations to help you find the right match:
1. Identify Your Goals: Be clear about what you want to achieve. Are you looking to advance in your current role, or are you exploring a different path altogether? Understanding your goals helps you narrow down the kind of guidance you need.
2. Look for Alignment: Your mentor doesn’t need to be a replica of your future self, but having shared values or a similar approach to work can foster a stronger bond. If someone has succeeded in a way that aligns with your aspirations, that’s a promising start.
3. Think Outside Your Circle: Don’t limit yourself to people in your immediate workspace. Professional organisations, alumni networks, and even online platforms like LinkedIn can help you connect with professionals who might be a great fit.
4. Be Proactive, Not Presumptuous: A meaningful mentorship starts with a polite, respectful request. A good opener could be as simple as: “I admire your work in [specific field]. Would you be open to a brief coffee chat about your career path?”

Step 3: Cultivating the Mentor Relationship
So, you’ve reached out, they’ve responded positively, and now you have your first meeting set up. “What’s next?” you might wonder. The magic of mentorship lies in building a relationship that grows over time. Here’s how to get the most out of it:
1. Set Clear Expectations Together: In your initial conversations, talk about how often you’d like to connect, what you hope to gain from the mentorship, and ask how you can add value to the relationship too. A good mentor appreciates mutual respect and understanding.
2. Ask Thoughtful Questions: Mentors are willing to share their expertise, but it’s up to you to guide the conversation. Instead of asking general questions like, “How did you become successful?” ask about specific challenges they faced, their decision-making process, or their approach to failure.
3. Be Open to Constructive Criticism: A mentor might share advice or perspectives that push you out of your comfort zone. They might even challenge your thinking or approach. These conversations aren’t always easy, but they’re often the most valuable.
4. Respect Their Time: Many mentors are busy professionals. Make the most of each meeting by being prepared with questions or updates on your progress. Show gratitude for their time, it strengthens the relationship and shows you’re committed.

Step 4: Leveraging Insights and Growing Together
Once the mentorship is established, it’s about leveraging the insights you’re gaining to make real changes in your life and work. Remember that mentorship isn’t a one-sided arrangement. You can bring fresh ideas and perspectives to the table, too.
1. Implement What You Learn: When a mentor suggests a new strategy or encourages a skill development, apply it! They’ll appreciate seeing you take action, and you’ll experience growth firsthand.
2. Share Your Wins (and Struggles): Mentors want to see you succeed, so don’t hesitate to share your progress or challenges. These updates not only make your mentorship journey more engaging but also allow your mentor to provide more tailored advice.
3. Build Your Network: A great mentor can introduce you to others in their network, broadening your professional circle. As you build your skills, don’t forget to connect with others they introduce you to—you never know where those connections might lead.
4. Give Back: Mentorship is about reciprocity. Offer your help in areas where you can add value, whether it’s by sharing insights from your own industry or assisting with a project. Over time, this becomes a true partnership rather than a one-sided exchange.

Step 5: Growing Beyond the Mentorship
Sometimes, a mentorship relationship naturally ends as you reach certain milestones or transition to a new phase of your career. When that time comes, honor the experience and express gratitude. Many mentorships transform into lasting friendships or even professional collaborations.
And remember, as you move forward, there’s a new generation of professionals looking for mentors, too. Maybe you’ll become the kind of mentor who guided you through your journey.

In Closing
Mentorship isn’t just about finding someone wiser; it’s about building a relationship that helps both mentor and mentee grow. It takes curiosity, humility, and a bit of courage, but the rewards are often life-changing.
So, who’s that person you’ve been admiring from afar?
Maybe it’s time to reach out—who knows what doors it might open?